New blog bitches!
No more updates here!

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Time to close this chapter and start anew.
:)
No use looking back.
I'll always love you though.
NO I'm NOT tryna make u feel guilty you asshole.
:D

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My last attempts...
September 29th.
October 2nd.

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One of those days again. I wish he can be the same with me. I wish he'd care about this relationship as much as I do now. I wish he'd accept me the way I am and not try to change that. I love him. But more so, I don't think he means the same when he says these three words anymore. For my birthday, I wish he'd treat me as he would before this recent break up. I don't need anything. If he does buy anything, I'll give it back and I'll tell him what I really want.

I love him.

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Another hopeless night. Space is key as James would say. But the five letters that make up this word frightens me so much. Instead of it being temporary, what if it ends up being forever? I thought I had made significant progress in winning you back yesterday, but it turns out it was just another failure of mine. What would of happened if my phone hadn't died? Would we have been together right now? You were on your third rule and I was busy negotiating on rule number two. I feel so stupid so childish that I had wasted time even trying to negotiate with you on number two. Why hadn't I just listened and let you continue? It keeps me wondering what if you had finished with all your rules? And that I had agreed to follow them all? I would probably be very happy right now.

Baby, I miss you so much. I can feel your pain, each and everytime I get mad and shun you out of my life. Now I feel how much it hurts. Baby, you're my everything. I can't believe how you managed to tell me to stop seeing you as the only guy in the world. You may not be the only guy in the world, but you're the ONLY guy for me. I'm sorry, I know I fucked up on Wednesday. What if I hadn't been mad at you on that day? We would of been still very happy and together. I wish I can turn back time; now that I have realized the mistake that I have made. I love you. I love you for who you are. I love you the most before you even changed. Although the eating part could of been a bit cleaner haha. But that's all a part of what makes francisco urrea himself. And what sucks is that I'd never be able to go back to these wonderful/unsanitary times. I love you again. I wish you can see through these words. Through this pain. That deep down I'd do anything for you now.
You're my one and only Frankie, baby, babe.
Goodbye.

If faith is with me tonight and you do happen to stumble upon this, if you your mind, please call, I'll be up waiting tonight.

Baby I love you. I only want to be with you. For now until the end.

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I feel that he doesn't want to be with me. Yet he's doing it because he feels sorry for me. I mean why else would he say I love you and still be confused? Those three words mean exactly what they stand for. There is no reason to be confused after saying those three words to someone who you have these feelings for. It hurts how it took him so long to decide over her and I. And in the end, yes I was no doubt happy that he chose me. But what really messed me up was that he didn't sound so pleased with his decision. This keeps me wondering what this girl has that I never will have, and what keeps him attracted to her so much. She must be a special one. :)

>.< blogging cuz I can sleep blah!

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I'm a fucken fail.
I don't deserve to be here.
I don't need your pity.
So go on with your life and I'll attempt to do the same.
I love you. I always will.
:)

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Let's see how long this will last.
Doing good when he's not around. >.<
I should keep myself occupied. :)

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My last resort. I never asked you about where this girl came from. All I wanted to know was is she your cousin? Or was she an ex? I can care less about her family.

I hope he stays away from me tomorrow.
As of now, I need him to treat me like shit. Because he's not the one that has fallen hard for me, and this would be an easier thing to do. For me it's the other way around. I'm the one who fell hardest for him. Now it's gonna be hard to back out.

I need to go to a psychologist.
There's something wrong.
>.>

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I can't fucken take this anymore.
I need to get out quick.
Before I go suicidal.
He has no fucken trust.
I can never be what I want in life if he's still around.
Yes I know he cares.
But there's a fucken limit.

Can't wait till college.
Can't wait till I'm 18.
Fuck this shit.
If he's keeping it up I'm moving out.

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